Saturday, 7 March 2009

Investigations are continuing...

The other po-faced bit about the Mandy-takes-a-custard-bath episode...

(No, Mandy, no: did no-one explain that red nose day is NEXT week?) the way in which the Police have decided to "launch an investigation". Pardon?

An investigation? Do they not watch the news? This bird with dark hair walked up to Peter and tipped green slime over him. Then she was interviewed later explaining why she did it.

Various news agencies helpfully captioned her as Miss Deen, of campaign group Plane Stupid. She is 29 and lives in Brighton. Sorted.

Yet we need an investigation?

I wonder how many hours of police time, how many forms, and ultimately how many thousands of pounds that will cost.

Of course we need to investigate things sometimes. When government or social services or anyone screws up, an investigation is useful. But in my own experience of trouble-shooting some very troublesome business issues, it doesn't take a genius or much more than a few hours of knocking heads to get to the bottom of most things.

Its called "finding out" what went on. Giving the process a grandiose sort of word like "investigation" guarantees that it will all get a load more complicated and take twice as long.

As for an "inquiry": forget it. You just know that particular beast isn't going to deliver any answers. Only more questions

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